#WisdomWednesday — What’s Meant to Be: Discerning Ego And Dharma With Gerardo Gonzalez

As the saying goes, the ego is the enemy. We all have to battle with our egos as we try to understand ourselves. It's also challenging to discover our dharma — our path to becoming what we're meant to be. It can be a challenging quest to complete as we face external pressure and worldly desires. Becoming aware of our ego is key to keeping ourselves grounded and balanced as we search for our divine purpose.

In this episode, Rosie and Tessa sit down with their first-ever guest on Wisdom Wednesday, Gerardo Gonzalez. Gerardo shares his story and seeks to find wisdom about his ego-driven struggle to follow his dharma. They answer the question, “How do you differentiate ego and dharma?” Rosie and Tessa also share their insights on dealing with the ego without allowing it to take over your dharma. They leave pieces of advice for Gerardo's quest to unfold his path while staying balanced and grounded.

Tune in to this episode and discover how to fulfill your dharma without letting your ego take over!

Here are three reasons why you should listen to the full episode:

Understand the difference between operating from the ego and fulfilling your dharma.
Hear Gerardo's story about his ego-driven struggle to fulfill his dharma.
Learn from Rosie and Tessa’s pieces of advice for Gerardo about becoming what you’re meant to be.

Resources

Connect with Gerardo: Instagram
Watch Wisdom Wednesday videos on YouTube
We’d love to get a listener on board the Wisdom Wednesday Podcast! Send us an email at info@radicallyloved.com with the subject “Wisdom Wednesday Guest” and tell us your name, contact information, and any topic or question you’d want to discuss.
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Episode Highlights

A Little About Gerardo

Gerardo is a yoga teacher with almost 300 hours of training.
He also has an engineering job.
Yoga is his passion.
He dreams of opening a yoga studio but is unsure if getting a studio is his dharma or would be nothing more than fueling his ego.

[18:14] “There’s always going to be ego in whatever you do, right? But how are you going to utilize it to fuel what your purpose is? As opposed to, ‘allow the ego to take over and let the ego take the reins.’”

Defining Ego

The ego is a klesha — one of the five afflictions of the mind. It’s a desire for more pleasure.
The other four are ignorance, attachment, aversion, and fear of death.
When you operate from any of these states, it’s going to cause suffering.
The ego is a part of us that desires validation. It's an insatiable type of energetic or power-driven acquisition.
When we feed our ego, we feed a part of ourselves that isn’t serving our highest good.

[22:14] "If we let the ego drive — like if the ego is in the driver's seat with the reins — we can become these people that are so far separated from our Dharma and our self that we don't even recognize that maybe we take a wrong turn, and it becomes very dark and scary and lonely."

Defining Dharma

Your dharma is your path, journey, destination, or unique pathway to achieving enlightenment or happiness.

[23:06] “Your character is a result of you living your Dharma.”

It is a predetermined path that you instinctively acquire.
Straying away from your path can cause unhappiness.

Ego vs. Dharma

Operating from the ego is very self-serving.
Meanwhile, following your dharma is self-serving while also being in the service of others.
When you follow your dharma, you do act without any expectations.
Your ego serves your worldly or fleeting desires. Your dharma serves your spiritual desires.

Differentiating Ego and Dharma

Ask yourself, "would I do this if I wasn't getting paid?" or, "would I do this if I knew nobody would ever see it?"
If you answer yes, then it's a higher calling. It's your dharma — it's meant to be.
Play the whole thing in your mind. Imagine doing something without money, recognition, or attention.
There’s always going to be ego. What matters is how you utilize your ego to fuel what your purpose is meant to be.
The ego and dharma can work together in harmony if the ego does not take the reins.

Following The Path to What You’re Meant to Be

It's challenging to follow a path that can't pay your bills.
Rosie diversified her yoga career and stabilized the path she wanted to take.
For Rosie, once you find the gravitas, there is just you and success.
Rosie's advice is: dive in.

Gerardo’s Story

His yoga teacher training experience allowed him to discover that he has a well-developed ego and wanted to work on it.
He acknowledges that his ego helped him get to where he is, but it also hampers him.

[29:44] “I think it’s ego [that] has helped me get there, but I can’t rely on that. It’s also hampering me.”

Gerardo shares that he worries about anything that feeds his ego — he thinks it’s dangerous.
He gets vulnerable when his students acknowledge his work as a yoga teacher.

Rosie’s Response To Gerardo

Awareness of the ego is a step in the right direction to what’s meant to be.
There is a difference between being confident and being egocentric.

[35:00] “I think it’s really important to have confidence but to not let it become egocentric.”

It’s okay to be recognized for helping others. What’s important is you don’t allow your ego to take over and prevent you from what’s meant to be.
Allow yourself to have the confidence to say you’re a good teacher. Be proud that you can help other people.
It’s still important to have the confidence to do something well. That confidence can inspire someone else to be confident too.

Tessa’s Response To Gerardo

It's a matter of knowing how to stay balanced and grounded even if our ego is getting fed.
The practices in your life that keep you grounded are your safety net.
We need our checks and balances to keep us honest.
When it comes to jumping into a new venture, practice the worst-case scenario in your head to see if you are open to failure and capable of adjusting.

Rosie’s Writing Journey

Rosie opens up about her journey of writing a book and dealing with final edits.
She shares how her ego made her feel that her work could be better due to her perfectionist tendencies.
She explains to Gerardo that expectations coming from the desire to be perfect are premeditated resentment. Those come from the ego.
Rosie assures Gerardo that it is a challenge to follow your path without getting the ego involved. Awareness is critical.

About Gerardo

Gerardo Gonzalez is a yoga teacher, engineer, father of three, and the first-ever guest on Wisdom Wednesday. He is passionate about experiencing a well-lived life through yoga, books, travel, food, and experiences. He currently has an engineering job but seeks to venture into a path living out his passion for yoga. For him, yoga is a tool that enables him to live a good life.

You can connect with Gerardo via Instagram.